Thursday, September 08, 2005

Homework

I can't sleep. I tried for a while, but work today just left too much lactic acid in me. I dutifully lied there for like an hour, and then I started thinking about lying there, and anyone who's experienced even a single night of sleeplessness knows where this train goes. So I'm trudging to the bathroom, and opening the cabinet, and just as I'm reaching for a fistful of large-animal tranquilizers to boil down into a tasty reduction, I remember that someone gave me this assignment like weeks ago, and thought that working on it might, I don't know, make me sleepy or relaxed or something. The assignment was to list five foods that remind me of childhood, or of being a kid--and if you can find a difference between those, you've taken too many improv classes.

So here goes. And I'm going to do this with a minimum of weepy explanation:

1. Marrow bones.

2. Welsh Rarebit on English muffins instead of bread.

3. Chocolate cupcakes with lime frosting instead of birthday cake.

4. Seckel pears from the tree in the yard.

5. A carrot that I pulled straight from the ground and wiped off and ate without washing.

Hmm. My left eye just twitched, but I'm still not tired. Let's do some more:

6. Little ice cream cups with "sundae" topping that you lick off the paper pull-back lid to get it all, then you eat the ice cream with a flat wood spoon. I got these from the dairy at Cornell and later, after my parents got divorced, I was allowed to get Hostess fruit pies there, too. But not before. Yeah, you don't need me to figure that one out.

7. Salmon patties. I don't know what ethnicity these are. Think burgers, then make the burgers out of canned salmon. Way, way better than they have any right to be. My grandma would make a plate of them and before the plate hit the table, they'd all be gone, courtesy of my really big for a little kid teeth.

8. Apple pan dowdy. Ask your oldest male relative.

9. Crab legs. All I could eat. Now I know they were frozen.

10. This isn't really my usual funny shtick, is it? It's like my normal edgy-but-an-okay-guy-underneath thing has combined with my tiredness and work angst oh and plus this goddamned ridiculous idea of food from when you were a kid, thanks a lot, into something even I have to admit is a little melancholy, no matter how much I try to buoy it up with snide asides.

11. Then again, maybe it's just bittersweet to me, since I'm the one remembering my childhood, and not you/yours. You're just reading about a kid eating carrots. I know--cry me a fucking river.

12. The skin on chocolate pudding.

13. French fries at a diner with a friend of mine who put ketchup on them and when his mom said "maybe Dan doesn't like ketchup on his fries," responded without a pause "who doesn't like ketchup on their fries?" The truth was, I kind of didn't.

14. I want to write about my first great oyster, but refuse.

15. The cupcakes were my choice, by the way.

16. Maine lobsters, in Maine. I think I was 2.

That'll do. I actually am a little drowsy now, and that didn't even take that long. Plus, I won't feel like I'm walking through gauze all day tomorrow. At least if I fall asleep now.

Or, okay, now.

Dammit.

45 Comments:

Blogger MEalCentric said...

You ate too well as a kid. Marrow bones and lobster?! Man I was chowing on blue box macaroni, and not even the Kraft brand, just "Ralphs Macaroni and Cheese". FYI, a fistful of tylenol PM is a great sleep aid and wont make you feel hung over the next day.

9:11 AM  
Blogger edbrinick4859 said...

I really enjoyed your blog. This is a cool Website Check it out now by Clicking Here . I know that you will find this WebSite Very Interesting Every one wants a Free LapTop Computer!

6:40 AM  
Blogger Dorf said...

I can appreciate this assignment of yours. It's the reason why I got inexplicably happy the other day when I forgot to eat breakfast and had to eat one of those Handi-snacks from a vending machine, you know, the ones with the fake, plastic feeling orange cheese and the salty crackers. Plus, of course, that clever little red stick, ever the useful tool for spreading the cheese. And oh that cheese, it takes me back to the days of morning recess, kickball games, and trapper keepers.

10:55 PM  
Blogger 蘭蘭的 said...

如果你不思考未來,你便不會有未來..................................................

4:39 AM  
Blogger 冷漠 said...

A stitch in time saves nine. ....................................................

8:03 AM  
Blogger chat said...

人逢順境不逞強,身處逆境不示弱。........................................

2:10 AM  
Blogger 曉豪 said...

成人色情電影院色情卡通貼圖色情片免費線上觀賞手機色情視訊手機色情電話kiss圖片kiss圖片區kiss臺灣kiss臺灣色情貼圖區mobile01正妹牆sex女優免費影片sex女優短片sog色論壇sorry演唱會spongebobsuperjunior成員tt 同志網tt1069論壇tt1096 同志網tt1096同志網tt同志交友網站tw king片王tw18成年人網tw18免費線上短片tw18貼圖sm卡通影片sm3usj成員介紹sex女優電影sex女優影片學生妹做愛自拍影片夫妻聯誼情色視訊色情遊戲

11:18 AM  
Blogger 陳水慧 said...

0401影音成人影片交流愛撫淫叫色情照片性愛圖片女生如何自慰激突成人論壇美女脫胸罩走光一夜正妹視訊情人性愛論壇85cc影城性伴侶85cc色情影片打手槍情色視訊聊天室色情a片色情色情圖片限制級照片色情電話520sex免費色情網情色性愛一夜情聊天網成人聊天網視訊成人台灣性網av一夜女情色av淫女免費視訊美女挑逗情色影音聊天作愛影片辣妹清涼秀美女做愛成人自拍貼圖成人資訊色論壇台灣色情成人網站色情視訊聊天露三點打砲情色性愛貼圖av成人網成人影片

10:19 PM  
Blogger 茂珊茂珊 said...

how do u do?xvideo打飛機專用網洪爺免費洪爺色情片洪爺貼圖區洪爺成人線上洪爺影城洪爺色論壇洪爺貼圖洪爺成年人網洪爺免費色情洪爺色情貼援交妹辣妹野球拳情色文學情趣聊天室性感辣妹裸體遊戲做愛偷拍一夜情視訊洪爺色情貼洪爺免費色情洪爺成年人網洪爺貼圖洪爺色論壇洪爺影城洪爺成人線上洪爺貼圖區洪爺色情片洪爺免費洪爺色情貼洪爺免費色情洪爺成年人網洪爺貼圖洪爺色論壇洪爺影城洪爺成人線上洪爺貼圖區洪爺色情片洪爺免費洪爺免費洪爺色情片洪爺貼圖區洪爺影城洪爺色論壇洪爺貼圖洪爺成年人網洪爺免費色情洪爺色情貼洪爺成人線上

7:59 PM  
Blogger JeremiahRenne332 said...

向小善致敬,它使人生旅程較為平順。........................................

3:57 AM  
Blogger G702aynelleKress0 said...

被人揭下面具是一種失敗,自己揭下面具卻是種勝利。..................................................

7:31 PM  
Blogger 家祥皇雯 said...

ut聊天77p2p85cc85st85街視訊視訊聊天ava片a片下載成人情色色情影音視訊聊天洪爺影城洪爺免費視訊免費a片免費一對多utsogo論壇ut聊天室成人片免費看................

9:41 PM  
Blogger 嘉雯 said...

天下沒有走不通的路,沒有克服不了的困難,沒有打不敗的敵人。........................................

7:52 PM  
Blogger 劉KarolR_Sundquis said...

憂能傷身,保重哦!.............................................

9:46 PM  
Blogger 心良 said...

人間好話,要如海綿遇水牢牢吸住.........................

6:08 AM  
Blogger Tro0223y_Millan said...

卡通成人影片 免費視訊金瓶梅 中年聊天室 aio交友愛情館影片免費85 歐美交友 自拍女優 性感成人內衣表演秀 女同影片 援交偷拍實錄 激情免費視訊聊天室 女生愛愛影片 情趣按摩貼圖 18性愛 夢幻少女寫真館 線上成人影城 免費a片貼 杜雷斯 色情影片 一夜情 383成人網 完美女人視訊 玩美女人視訊 線上美女 辣妹裸體 人妻的秘密 人妻熟女館 情色視訊 空姐 a圖a片交流區 美女寫真貼圖區 85cc線上 微風視訊成人 嘟嘟聊天室 sp7777.com 絲襪貼圖 熟女援交留言板 成人情色網 Live173 免費ava片線上看 洪爺影城色情網線上看 大奶美女做愛影片 做愛sex 免費下載av片 成人巨乳圖片 成人 後宮電影a下載 限制級成人網 channel0204 高中性愛影片 模特兒走光露點寫真

11:54 AM  
Blogger SeymourZ_Reger嘉容 said...

人不能像動物一樣活著,而應該追求知識和美德..................................................

12:34 AM  
Blogger NorrisBradwell04張 said...

成熟,就是有能力適應生活中的模糊。..................................................

11:03 AM  
Blogger SadeRa盈君iford0412 said...

笑話精華~輕鬆一下~
孫悟空為什麼能大鬧天宮,而打不過諸多妖精?
哭笑不得的十二件事
浪漫一點行不行
校園尷尬事件大全(爆笑)
校園寢室騷擾電話

11:19 PM  
Blogger 文行文行 said...

Man proposes, God disposes................................................................

10:35 PM  
Blogger 楊俊美 said...

Keep in contact. Good Luck..................................................

9:39 PM  
Blogger AlaynaGainer1姿吟 said...

在莫非定律中有項笨蛋定律:「一個組織中的笨蛋,恆大於等於三分之二。」......................................................................

11:33 AM  
Blogger 偉倫 said...

與人相處不妨多用眼睛說話,多用嘴巴思考.................................................................

7:25 PM  
Blogger 郁雯郁雯 said...

成熟,就是有能力適應生活中的模糊。.................................................................

6:42 AM  
Blogger 啟佐啟佐 said...

認清問題就等於已經解決了一半的問題。.................................................................

3:56 PM  
Blogger JasonBirk佳琪 said...

當一個人內心能容納兩樣相互衝突的東西,這個人便開始變得有價值了。............................................................

9:33 PM  
Blogger JasonBirk佳琪 said...

A friend to everybody is a friend to nobody...................................................................

9:36 PM  
Blogger JasonBirk佳琪 said...

A good medicine tastes bitter. ..................................................................

9:36 PM  
Blogger 義珊義珊 said...

來給你加油,幫你推一下喔~期待你的下一個更新,謝謝..................................................................

1:25 AM  
Blogger 蕙春蕙春 said...

認識自己,是發現妳的真性格、掌握妳的命運、創照你前程的根源。............................................................

5:16 PM  
Blogger 曾法幸 said...

人因夢想而偉大,要堅持自己的理想哦!..................................................................

1:04 AM  
Blogger 曾法幸 said...

凡事三思而行,跑得太快是會滑倒的。..................................................

5:52 PM  
Blogger 琬安琬安 said...

i consder your artical is so nice!..................................................................

6:47 AM  
Blogger 陳晏李秀樺雄 said...

好的blog值得一推再推,要愈來愈好哦!!!!............................................................

2:00 AM  
Blogger 嘉王偉 said...

愛情是一種發明,需要不斷改良。只是,這種發明和其他發明不一樣,它沒有專利權,隨時會被人搶走。.................................................................

1:34 AM  
Blogger 515152 said...

獨居時,要反省自己的過錯;在社會大眾之間,則要忘卻別人的過失。..................................................

7:09 AM  
Blogger 佳呈均慧 said...

時間就是塑造生命的材料。

6:53 AM  
Blogger 凱許倫 said...

It is easier to get than to keep it.......................................................................

11:34 PM  
Blogger 偉曹琬 said...

人生有些波折,才能有些成長,所以不論順逆,凡是成長、成功的助緣,都應該心存感激。.................................................

4:53 PM  
Blogger 偉曹琬 said...

世界上沒有本來就應該的事,因為老天爺也沒有劇本..................................................

4:53 PM  
Blogger 桂江江江江宸 said...

看著你的BLOG 好多朋友都回應 真厲害............................................................

12:18 AM  
Blogger 玉韓韓韓婷韓韓韓韓 said...

知識可以傳授,智慧卻不行。每個人必須成為他自己。............................................................

12:38 AM  
Blogger 郭任任任任任俊任任 said...

成熟,就是有能力適應生活中的模糊。............................................................

5:29 AM  
Blogger 麗王王珠 said...

Subtlety is better than force. ......................................................................

4:54 PM  
Blogger 孫邦柔 said...

支持大大~很有啟發性......................................................

2:24 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home